*Martha’s Way* Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips. |
*Maxine’s Way * Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete’s sake! You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it, anyway! |
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes. | Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix, keep it in the pantry for up to a year. |
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won’t be any white mess on the outside of the cake. | Go to the bakery! They’ll even decorate it for you. |
If you accidentally oversalt a dish while it’s still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant “fix-me-up.” | If you oversalt a dish while you are cooking, that’s too bad. Please recite with me the real woman’s motto: “I made it and you will eat it and I don’t care how bad it tastes!” |
Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks. | Celery? Never heard of it! |
Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish. | The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust so I don’t. |
Cure for headaches: take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away. | Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink! |
If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy. | Go ask that very cute neighbor if he can open it for you. |
Don’t throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces. | Leftover wine???????????
HELLO !!!!!!! |
The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket. Money can’t buy happiness — but somehow it’s more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than in a Hyundai. Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single. Living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween. After a certain age, if you don’t wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead. As usual, if you don’t forward this to 10 of your friends within the next 5 minutes, your belly button will fall off. Really… it’s true! Have I ever lied to you? |